when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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