I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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