Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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