oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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