Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
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Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
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You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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