I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize