More tranny stories later!
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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