No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
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the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
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Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
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