..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize