I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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