Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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