after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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