I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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