I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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