I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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