i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize