i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize