I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize