sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize