Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize