just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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