It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize