I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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