No, drunk sperm still make babies.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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