Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
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I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
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She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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