I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
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