Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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