You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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