Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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