when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
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Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
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You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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