I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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