Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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