We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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