I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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