it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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