never play flip cup with pint glasses
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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