Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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