The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize