Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize