He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
should my penis look like a turkey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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