I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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