I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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