So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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