Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize