its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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