Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize