I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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