She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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