end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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