y did u give ur computer a hand job?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize